Grandmother, one year later.

Today marks one year since my grandmother passed away. Some of my family took my grandfather up to Rose Hills to visit her crypt. It was a good trip up to the top of the hill and to be able to spend some time with my family. Afterwards we took grandpa home so he could take a nap and we went to lunch.

Today obviously brings back a flood of memories. As I look back at the last year I’m reminded of some of the things which are lacking.

I’m sad she’s not around physically here. I miss her so much. I still think of her often. I find it hard to be and my grandparent’s house because I still expect her to come walking out of the kitchen and sit down next to me on the couch. I miss her cooking. I miss her advice. I miss her voice. I’m sad she is not going to be apart of our son’s life…

Reading these back one thing is obvious, I still hurt and will probably still hurt for a long time.

Being just past easter and *celebrating* her passing (and seeing the irony in the situation of her passing and the timing)… instead of focusing on things which encourage sorrow, when I think of my grandmother I’ve been trying to think of the legacy she has left with us.

Love. A grandmother’s love is amazing. It’s like a mother’s love on steroids. I spent a lot of my childhood with my grandparents and they did help raise me. Her love was strong, unconditional and accepting, no matter how many times you messed up or were wrong, she just LOVED you.

Generosity. I’ve been told on many occasions that I’m generous, or that I have a generous heart. Those words are nice but I can’t take credit. It’s obvious I learned this from her. I’ve never witnessed someone be as generous in all that they did, give and serve people as much as my grandmother did.

Strength and Sacrifice. My grandparents have a traditional ethnic emigration story. They both worked hard to do the best they could for their children and grandchildren. My grandmother did all that work plus raise children, grandchildren and battle illness. Her strength and will to move forward despite all the hurdles and continue to improve herself and provide for her children is amazing. I will never fully understand how she did it.

Encouragement. She just always seemed to have the right encouragement for me when when I was confused or unsure. She was honest and always encouraged us to do the same thing. I wouldn’t have graduated college it it wasn’t for her encouragement and help.

Intelligence. This one is eye opening. You see my grandmother never did schooling past the 3rd grade in Italy, yet she was one of the smartest persons I’ve ever encountered. It just goes to show you that being good at memorizing times tables, knowing historical facts/trivia, knowing how to read or spell properly doesn’t make you Intelligent. Though she only made it to 3rd grade due to circumstances in Italy at the time, she still encouraged ME to get an education and it wasn’t to become smart, it was to allow myself more opportunities in life.

Faith. Knowing her life story, you can see that faith was a HUGE part of her life. She went to church, she believed in Jesus and she served people.

Food and Entertainment/Welcome. No one can cook like my grandmother could. This is a fact, if you’ve eaten at the restaurant and liked it, you’ve really only taste maybe 25% of her cooking knowledge. She also loved to entertain and host people and would always welcome the ever so popular *uninvited guests* as if they were invited. I never understood it but it must’ve been the right thing to do.
I find it amazing that her passing came as a result of doing something she loved, she was serving spaghetti at her church, something she did every year and she happened to slip, fall and break her femur. She laid in a hospital for a week and that was the end. She died serving food! She LOVED to make people happy!

I can go on… and while tears come out I’m also beginning to feel much better. I want to not forget the many good and positive things Giuseppina (Teti) Persico, my grandmother, has done in and for my life. I will make sure our son knows about her and I hope to instill some of these qualities in his life.